My life is pretty much the same episode played over and over and over again with the occasional two part season finale.
I am less than two weeks away from running my very first half marathon and I am not sure how I feel about it. The race is the day after my dads birthday and with every heavy foot that falls on my long runs all I can think about is him.
I wish I could be more religious or spiritual and tell myself that he's looking down and smiling. Who knows maybe he is. He would more likely be sitting behind a tree somewhere looking for the perfect opportunity to jump out and scare me. That sounds more like him.
Life has this crazy way of throwing curve balls at you.
You think you have everything figured out and then BAM something comes out of no where.
The thing is, you just have to brush it off and get back out there.
A new friend of mine sent me a message after checking out my blog and told me how much she loved the line I said in my re-cap of Chips story.
"It's okay to mourn the loss of your fairy tale"
We have these ideas of how life is supposed to be. How our marriages, our kids, our training, our health is supposed to be. More times than not it doesn't work out that way. You don't always get your fairy tale.
It's more than okay to mourn the loss of that. When Chip was born he didn't pass away, he's healthy and happy thank goodness but for a long time I mourned the loss of that fairy tale. My dad and I didn't always have the picture perfect relationship and sometimes I feel like I'm mourning the loss of that fairy tale than I am mourning the loss of him. Life is weird like that.
Life.is.weird.
That's all there is to it. No rhyme or reason, just some weird shit that sometimes is beautiful and sometimes leaves you thinking WTF.
Yeah this post is a little crazy and out there, and I need to finish my coffee before I try to complete anything else today.
In the meantime I leave you with a little something to make you smile.
Last night while we were playing outside I thought to myself. Why do I always try to race to get into a pose to capture it on my timer app when I have two (and a half) completely capable picture takers right here.
Well the following pictures reminded me why that Timer App is the best invention yet.
I can't help to laugh at the pictures that is the same reason I don't trust my 7 year old and husband with the camera. Probably the same reason you don't see me in many pictures.
ReplyDeleteMy fairy tale was that my grandpa was going to live forever. When he passed it was almost like we lost the sense of family. We are slowly getting it back but I mourn that fairy tale at least 3 times a year. After all, he was in my life for my first 29 years and 360 days
Ha ha.. I needed a little smile today!!
ReplyDeleteLife is weird and we all have a fairy tale or two to mourn, so you're not alone...love those pics though :)
ReplyDeleteLife is weird and no day is truly ever the same ya know. LOL thats why my boys cant take pictures of me!
ReplyDeleteLife is indeed weird. Almost eight years later I still mourn the loss of my fairy tale with my daughter. She's healthy and strong and amazing but I didn't get to have the pregnancy, delivery, and infancy I dreamed about.
ReplyDeleteAnd on a lighter note: I have living room envy! I want big comfy chairs around a woodstove.
I love this post and most definitely life is beyond weird :)
ReplyDeleteI love this ;) I've mourned my fairy tale of life and relationships with certain people- especially my mom, many many times. Thanks for writing this ;) I'm a sucky blog friend and don't always comment and read in a timely manner but just wanted to let ya know I'm still reading!!
ReplyDelete